Morning tea with Tak san

Yesterday morning I had the pleasure of having Tak San stopping by for a brief visit. It all started with a phone call to him about 8:45, except, it did not go as planned. You see, Tak San is 91 years old and a little hard of hearing without the help of is hearing aid. So our conversation went something like this...

Tak San: "Moshi, Moshi"

Me: "Hello Tak San, Ohiyo Gozymas" (Good Morning)

Tak San: "Moshi, Moshi"

Me: "Moshi, Moshi?"

Tak San: "Hai"

Me: Hello, Tak San this is Lori"

Tak San: Moshi, Moshi...

I'm sure you get the gist so after about 5 minutes of moshi, moshi and Chota matte, kudusai (just a minute, please) and Tak san readjusting his hearing aide we decided that it was best he stop by my home. He lives in an apartment about two minutes away...maybe about 5-10 minutes for him, depending on how he feels that day.

I'm drawn to this sweet man. I think because he reminds me of my grandma Blueye.  He is a very soft spoken man, who is very hard of hearing and likes to make jokes, too.  He says that his Japanese friends don't understand him because they don' t have a sense of humor. This makes me chuckle because he got a big kick out that just telling! There is also a gentleness to him and I suppose that's what brings about the similarities.  I wish that I had a picture of him and I didn't think to ask him yesterday while we sat outside in the morning sunshine drinking tea.  His brief visit lasted 2.5 hrs and ended when the noon whistle blew.  I wish it hadn't, I would have loved to have visited with him longer...but in those few hours this is what I learned:

Tak san was born Jan 30,1921 in Ohme City.  He grew up in Tachikawa and attended University in Shinjuku where he studied engineering. When he was 12 he studied English from an American lady who married a Japanese man.  Back then it was rare for Japanese to learn English. Back then if you were educated in the Sciences you spoke German, and if you studied the Arts it was French because those are the two countries where many attended university.  He was 19 when Tokyo was first bombed during WWII.  He was eating Soba noodles and wondered why the Japanese military were doing practice runs on their own people? They never imagined that it was the US.  He said the emperor's guards hoisted balloons around the palace so that the pilots would know not to bomb it.  It was only later did they realize that it was General Dolittle who bombed them then crashed in China.  He said that the Japanese had the highest respect for him because it took a lot of courage, bravery, and sacrifice to do that knowing he might not return home. This statement surprised and awed me.  It's hard to wrap my brain around what they must have thought and felt towards America back then being an American living here now. 

Tak san was married for almost 63 years and  they had 4 children - 3 sons, and 1 daughter; and 8 grandchildren each with one boy and one girl.  His sons live around the metropolitan Tokyo area sadly, he never hears from them.  This includes the son that lives in the same apartment complex as his. This saddens me. You can tell this makes him very sad, but he bucks up and says that they must work all day to provide for their wives.  His wife passed away Oct 26, 2010. He misses her every day.  On the 26th of each month he visits her grave and brings her flowers.  When he wakes up he tells her good morning, and before he sleeps he tells her goodnight and thanks her for staying with him throughout the day and night.  He says that not a moment goes by where he wants to share something with her, or he is reminded of her.  When he threads a needle, he is reminded of her. When he pours tea, he is reminded of her.  This made me cry...it was hard not, but he just went on to say that to him she was the Best Wife.

Currently, he is staying in a small apartment that his son rents for him until his son's house is built.  Then he'll go live with them upon completion. He gets very lonely if he stays cooped up too long during the day so he amuses himself by riding the bus around town and people watch.  He makes me laugh!  He says that he wonders why Japanese are so serious all the time..he watches their faces on the bus and wonders what they are thinking? Where are they going? They must not be happy people because nobody smiles.  I can't say for sure whether they are unhappy, but I do know that it's rare to see Japanese people smile out in public unless they are amongst their intimate friends.  Sometimes, he'll ride the bus to the local mall in town just buy some candy or he'll go to a store that sells international foods so he can send it to his daughter up in Hokkaido, where she lives in a small country town.  During one of his outings he found a little hidden cafe where he'll have lunch at sometimes.  That's if he's "feeling physically fit to walk there" he proclaims with a chuckle.  This statement made me laugh out loud because at 91 he walks EVERYWHERE!  He has promised to take me there sometime - we'll walk, of course!